well it's been almost six months since my last blog. things have changes as things do in a six months span. And somethings are still the same.

tomorrow is thanksgiving. I am lucky enough to get to go to two. One with my family and one with my best friend's family, but also known as my adopted family. 

its weird to think that she was just here last year celebrating with us, and just had her first chemo treatment. its still really hard some days, i don't think its ever going to be ok with me. there are some random moments when i realize she`s gone and I have no parents. it is the weirdest realization to have. to know that the two people who created you and gone and well before their time.

as much as I hate her not being here, there are good times in my life as well. I have my family who are great. My friends who I would not trade for anything in this whole world and my job which keeps me on my toes.

then there is him. oh so much to say about him. the one boy who has held my heart forever. that one person who knows me inside out. my first love. we had coffee in the summer and just talked. about everything and anything. then later he told me things that made me think. and now three months later i'm still thinking, but now i know what I want.